These past few days are improving my state of mind and more peacefulness is entering in myself. I think constant discipline on which thoughts to take into account and which everyday situations to try to let go is slowly starting to work. Also when starting to judge myself I am trying to stop and analyze if there was something I could do or it was out of my power to change it. And when I see I am only responsible for my bad mood I just accept that and instead of judging myself I am doing everything I can do to improve the respective situation.
So I am also trying to find ways to more help myself to overcome my issues instead of thinking how bad everything is because I am only able to change it. And last week I started a meditation challenge by Sarah Blondin in Insider Timer. The second mediation was about clearing dust form the body – I needed to imagine a tornado in front of me which was a symbol of all negativity. And so I needed to stand and while breathing strongly I was assuring how strong my legs are and no tornado could move me. So while I was continuing to breath the tornado disappeared bringing the sunlight back. Somehow this exercise affected me a lot in a good way and I tried to practice it also during the week whenever I felt I am loosing balance inside myself. And it helped to switch the focus from a negative situation towards more calmer thinking and react rationally not going into fear mode.
Secondly to have more positive, encouraging talk about myself and trying to silence my inner bully which sometimes is just waiting to come out and explode but as I was writing in one of my blogs before the bully inside is always there as long as you decide to break up this relationship. And also doing more sports and quitting coffee helps me to better structure my thoughts and feelings and I do not have the reason to judge myself of not being healthy because I am working on that. As hard as it is practice makes better and also practicing my mind is a challenge which is slowly moving forward. I know that the biggest issue to keep my balance is when something negative happens where I just automatically want to give up on everything and I know in regards of that I have still a lot to improve.
Also starting to write my blog has also been some type of therapy for me. Even though it took some time to finally start it, whenever I have finished writing all my negative thoughts have almost disappeared and it just feels good.
Lets see how the next week goes but I am keeping my promise to practice.
You will never speak to anyone more than you speak to yourself in your head, be kind to yourself. tinybuddha.com