Busy for myself

I lied and said I was busy, but not in a way most people understand. I was busy taking deeper breaths. I was busy silencing irrational thoughts. I was busy calming a racing heart. I was busy telling myself I am OK. B Oakman

It sound so familiar to my heart and I have been doing that myself and maybe sometimes too much. Especially when an outside world can be sometimes so overwhelming and in order to calm myself down I need to just shut it down and be in a quiet environment. Because sometimes nothing can be more difficult than to silence a mind going out of control.

It is ok to decide to be alone and to be busy with yourself. The only way to feel better and to get back outside is to be OK and at peace. And from my experience it takes a time to understand that as well. I have so often decided to put myself second and to go further not respecting my need for peace and recharge. Only because I would feel guilty and I would have imagined already 10 reasons how it would hurt someone. Therefore, I just continuously locked my emotions in a box thinking it will go away. But little I knew then that all these actions will lead to an even bigger confusion and chaos in my mind.

In order to avoid that or at least to start to decrease it – it is ok to take a break once in a while and be busy for yourself. It is like a circle – only a happy and peaceful inside will help you to be more a happier and calmer outside.

 

 

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