Welcome to my small haven, I hope I will be able to create it as cozy and helpful as I have imagined. I have had it on my mind for some time but going through life I have always found excuses to not do it. I want to create a place where I can share my various experiences and life lessons. I have thought maybe putting it on a “paper” will help me finally overcome my self created restrictions and expectations which I feel are not anymore useful and they are not allowing me to fully enjoy my life.
I was thinking should I write a lot or how should I organize it so I decided I will start with small steps and see where it goes. I hope it will be helpful not only for me but anyone who gets to read it.
So here is my short introduction via life:
Few years ago I moved from my hometown in Latvia to Germany to start everything new. I thought changing environment will change my life for the better. That everything will be much better than before and that I will be happier. But then again life happened – starting my second master studies, trying to finance them and finding work that I was dreaming of. Meeting different people and interacting with them. And somehow I ended up in the same self doubts and disappointments so I observed myself how I dealt with all and how I positioned myself. I could not understand then why I am again feeling the way I thought I will never feel. As always through searching validation from others I was living my life in the same way as before. So it came to a point that I did not trust myself, my opinions and I was doubting every decision I made. I knew it cannot go like that forever and I decided to try to figure out everything and start to trust myself again and take my life in my own hands this time for real and without any excuses. While going through this process I discovered that I am a highly sensitive person and it has helped me to understand why some things happened the way it did and explained why I am feeling the way I am.
I was sitting one evening on my balcony enjoying some good music and a thought came to my mind that I had never taken into account.
I am the only one responsible for myself and I am the only one who I should not let down and take care of my own feelings and thoughts. Because I am the one with whom I will share the whole life until the end and I would want to live with a happy myself.
We all have life lessons and situations we go through which makes us who we are today. I would never be the person I am today if I would not go via life as I did and for that I am grateful every second. I am trying to learn to be easier on myself in moments when I fail and do things that my real self has always wanted to do without any validation from others. Sometimes it works but sometimes it takes all the strength out of me. Therefore, I decided, in order to move forward for real this time, I should finally do what I planned some time ago and start to write. I would like to also share my passion for food, photography of those small, beautiful moments in life and everything else which makes me happy and enjoy the life. So I hope sharing via life will be helpful not only to me but also to someone who came to visit my small haven.
Livia via life